Happy New Year!
So, how’s it going?
This time of year can be so full of expectations and excitement, sprinkled with feelings of demotivation; particularly related to New Year’s Resolutions. Resolutions are intended to create meaningful and lasting change… And that’s what you want, right?!
Well, change can be challenging, at times scary, and seemingly elusive. This is the reason for Vlog #1 in which I will show you how to Revamp Your New Year’s Resolutions or any desired change. Please do watch this 15 minute video post that is Chuck Full of info, outlined in five steps towards making and keeping your goal, as well as trouble shooting tactics to overcome common obstacles, in order to position yourself for success.
Below you will find a summary of the Vlog transcript. Like Cliff’s Notes, these are the key point takeaways and can be supplemental to the video, as well as a reference source to come back to so you can stay on track and reach your chosen goal(s).
Keeping in Real... And SMART...
The Acronym SMART guides the 5-Step Process to create a Smart Goal and keepin’ with it:
Specific: Specify the actions you will take; what, when, where, with whom.
Meaningful: Check in with yourself and make sure this goal is genuinely guided by your values, as opposed to following social rules, pleasing others, or avoiding pain.
Adaptive: Does the goal head in a direction that will likely enhance your quality of life?
Realistic: Create a goal that is realistically achievable given your current circumstances and skill set.
Time-bound: Set a day, date, or time that you will participate in, &/or reach, the goal.
Even with a super Smart Goal, obstacles arise. Yet, do not despair, because you can troubleshoot and overcome any obstacles that you (RE)set your mind to...
2 Types of Obstacles to look out For:
1) External. External are those pesky lil (or big) buggers, like your car breaking down or your Aunt Edna unexpectedly showing up at your door. These pesky buggers can so easily become convenient excuses to not stick with your New Year’s Resolution; at least until your car is fixed and your aunt leaves. But, once the momentum of change has halted, it takes more effort to restart, making it way less likely that you will start back up again. So, do not stop. Do not let an external obstacle get in the way of meaningful change... Take action by showing up to your goal anyways.
2) Internal. When you show up anyways, (excuses begone), you are likely to encounter the deeper layer and the actual culprit in your desire to skip out on your resolution... that being Internal Cues.
These internal drivers come in the form of A) Self-Defeating Thoughts (such as “This is lame, why did I make this New Year’s Resolution in the first place? And actually, New Year’s Resolutions are lame too, so I’m not gonna do it anymore.”) and B) Challenging Emotions (anxiety, fear, sadness, grief, annoyance, etc.). Which often lead to C) Urges (the strong desire to do just about anything else than what you had set out to do).
In Short, the Internal Obstacle Equation of A + B = C, is the real New Year’s Resolution killer.
Don’t let it get to C ~ Deal with A and B with Mindful Action to Nip that C in the Bud.
2 Simple Mindful Techniques to Deescalate Internal Obstacles:
1) Name the thought as “Thought”; We give our power away to our thoughts, when we believe them to be true. By labeling it as a thought, it is “just a thought” and not necessary a hard and fast truth… It is one version of a countless variation of potential truths. And if the thought is unhelpful (ie. “New Year’s Resolutions are lame”), deliberately separate yourself from it through this simple mind technique.
2) Expansion Technique to create space between you and your emotions. It is important to have emotions, otherwise we would be robots, but when emotions lead us away from what we truly desire, then it is important to not let our emotions lead. The basic steps of the Expansion Technique are: a) Locate where in your body you feel the tension of that emotion, b) Breath in and out of that body part with awareness and observe the tension shift in whatever way it naturally does.
To reiterate, once you realize that you have been high-jacked by your thoughts &/or emotions (Thank you Reptilian Brain), hold them lightly in your awareness by using the above two suggestions, or any mindfulness techniques that work for you, to reduce their power over you. Once you have lessened the pull of these internal cues, proceed with taking action on your New Year’s Resolution via the Smart Goal trajectory. Wishing you the Best AND Have Fun!
I hope this first ever Everyday Coherence Vlog has been helpful. Please feel free to comment or ask questions. I will be back in February with another post to set my Monthly Vlog series in forward motion. Stay tuned and be well :D